11 CONSEQUENCES OF NOT SAYING 'I AM SORRY' TO YOUR SPOUSE

1. It can hinder and delay reconciliation process. Not saying 'i am sorry' makes the heart of the one offended heavy and unprepared for reconciliation. Reconciliation process is smooth when there is show of remorse by the offender. But in a case the offender is not remorseful, reconciliation may likely not hold.

2. It can make the offended spouse to lock up his or her heart, with the feeling that his or her spouse don't want the marriage to continue.

3. It can lead to divorce when an offended spouse feels an unending emotional torture. Some partners see divorce as the only option to end emotional abuse in marriage. Especially in a situation where the offence was deliberate and happens consistently without an apology.

4. It can kill affection in marriage. When you refuse to say 'I am sorry' after an offence against your partner, it will gradually kill the affection your partner has for you.

5. It can lead to revenge. This is true, because when you make it a tradition not to say 'i am sorry', after offending your spouse, it can make your spouse to start considering revenge, with the aim of making you have a taste of the pain you consistently put him or her through.

6. It can lead to suicide, if the offended spouse suffers prolonged emotional truama. It is traumatizing when you realize that the one you love and married to, never says 'I am sorry', whenever he or she hurts you so badly. It gets worse when the offence is delibrate. This experience can gradually lead an emotionally immature spouse to consider suicide, knowing that what he or she cherishes the most brings him or her endless emotional toture. 

7. It can lead to accumulation of unresolved conflicts in marriage. When you fail to say 'I am sorry', it simply means that your offence was deliberate and you want your spouse to feel the pain. When you fail to say 'I am sorry', you are simply piling up series of unresolved marital conflicts that will create an unhealthy marital atmosphere for love to find a place in your marriage. Saying 'I am sorry' is therapeutic and can heal the heart of an offended spouse within few seconds. But when not said, can create lots of unresolved conflicts that can affect relationship in marriage.

8. It can frustrate and dry up the 'Well of Patience' of your spouse. There are partners who are good in being patient with their partners. But when it  becomes a tradition that apology is not tendered  for offence committed, it has a way of drying up the 'Well of Patience' of the offended partner.

9. It can bring out the beast in your spouse. Like we say, everyone has a beast in him or her and it usually manifest when you push them to the wall. When your spouse discovers that you are always too proud to say 'I am sorry' anytime you offend them, it might lead to their outburst when they are fed up with your no show of remorse after an offence. This can trigger the beast in them as a result of prolonged endurance.

10. It can weaken the attitude of forgiveness in your spouse. Not saying 'i am sorry' whenever you offend your spouse can make them get tired of forgiving your offence. Many married men and women are tired of forgiving their spouses who never say 'I am sorry' or show remorse for their offences. When the act of forgiveness is missing in any marriage, that marriage is likely heading towards disaster.

11. Not saying 'i am sorry' cant make your spouse question and doubt your love for him or her. Whenever you offend your spouse and deliberately refuse to say 'I am sorry', your love becomes questionable. Yes, it is true that no one is perfect, but an apology shows that the offence was not deliberate. Zero apology after an offence shows that the offence was deliberate. No one takes pleasure in hurting the one he or she loves.

It is indeed profitable to say 'I am sorry' whenever you offend your spouse. It is healthy for marriage and keeps it going. There will be growing consequences if we make it a tradition not to apologise to our spouses whenever we offend them.
This sentence 'I AM SORRY' is a magical word that has the capacity to mend a wounded heart and win it back. 
If you want your marriage to be sustainable, you have to use these words as many times as you offend your spouse. 

If you find this write up helpful, do share to save millions of marriages.

Written & Published By:
BRO. ALIGWEKWE NNAMDI

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