IS OFFICE EMOTIONAL AFFAIR WITH COLLEAUGES CHEATING?

In our society today, 'EMOTIONAL AFFAIR' with the opposite sex outside marriage, especially in the office, is not seen by many as an act of cheating or infidelity in marriage.
It will be important to define the two terms (i.e. emotion and affair) to enable us have a clear understanding of this phrase 'Emotional Affair'. 

MEANING OF EMOTION
'Emotion means a person's internal state of being and involuntary physiological response to an object or a situation, based on or tied to physical state'.
To explain further based on this definition, emotion has to do with an involuntary inside feelings of a person. The word 'Feeling', is synonymous to emotion. Emotions or feelings are expressed mostly in response to persons, situations or object and also tied to it. But in this context, we are focusing on emotions or feelings expressed towards persons.

MEANING OF AFFAIR
The word 'Affair' means an event or sequence of events of a specified kind.
The word affair is synonymous to words like incident, happening, occurrence,  circumstance, event, business etc. Furthermore, an affair (i.e. incident, occurance, event) of a specific kind, can take place between two people (e.g. between two different sexes). 

Now that we have knowledge of the two key words (emotion and affair) let us look at what 'emotional affair' is all about, to enable us know if it is indeed an act of cheating.

MEANING OF EMOTIONAL AFFAIR
In this context, emotional affair can simply mean an affair between two opposite sexes based on emotions. It is an involuntary physiological response of a person, towards another (e.g. opposite sex) based on internal feelings as a result of an incident, happening, occurance etc, between two persons (e.g. of the opposite sex) Also, emotional affair can be an affair or relationship between a person and some other (e.g. male and female) which could lead to intimacy or strong feelings for each other.
Emotional affair with the opposite sex outside marriage, can affect the level of intimacy and emotional balance existing between you and your spouse at home.

Before an emotional affair starts, it must have started with a person (male or female) admiring the opposite sex in a given enviroment (e.g. office). The admiration gives birth to making advances towards the opposite sex, which goes on to mature into an affair.

They said affair becomes emotional, when there is an involuntary and uncontrollable feelings towards the opposite sex. This uncontrollable feelings can give birth to long term affair with an opposite sex other than your spouse. 

However, emotional affair with the opposite sex can be prevented from taking place, if controlled at the admiration stage.
There is nothing wrong in appreciating how God created one to look either handsome or beautiful. But make no mistake, the appreciation can lead to lust if not controlled. Jesus Christ our Lord, tagged lustful look as an act of adultery, as captured in Matthew 5: 28

[28] "But now I tell you: anyone who looks at a woman and wants to possess her is guilty of committing adultery with her in his heart".

Beloved, if you are weak in this area of your life, is it not better to delibrately keep your eyes off the opposite sex? Jesus also advised in Matthew 5: 29 saying

[29] "So if your right eye causes you to sin, take it out and throw it away! It is much better for you to lose a part of your body than to have your whole body thrown into hell".

Based on the above facts, we won't be wrong to say that emotional affair is an act of 'CHEATING'. It is no longer news that some married men and women indulge in emotional affair outside marriage. It often happens in our offices between colleagues.
Today, some married men have single or married ladies they are used to or have strong emotional feelings for in their office, more than they feel for their own wives at home. So they keep hanging around them, buying them lunch often, sending birthday and valentine cards and starring and smiling at them from their desks. Most times, the man like staying in her team when tasks are been given in the office. But guess what, the man never sleeps with this lady, but he is emotionally attached to her in the office. This is an act of cheating or infidelity and should be seen as such. Men are expected to share their emotions with their wives and not with another woman outside marriage.

The reverse is the case for ladies who are married but always love to win the attention of a good looking married man in their office. She keeps pretending she can't figure things out in the office and uses that excuse to always frequent the desk of this married good looking man, just to enjoy some emotional attachment with him. She remembers his birthday but forgets her husband's birthday and her wedding anniversary. She always love to stay on the same lunch table with this man, just to engage him in a conversation and keep hallucinating and wondering how she would have loved to have this man all to herself. She may not be sleeping with this man, but surely this act is another form of cheating or infidelity in marriage, although an emotional one.

Engaging in emotional affair anywhere whatsoever as a married man or woman is an act of cheating, infidelity or unfaithfulness.
Beloved, all emotions should be shared with our spouse in marriage till death do us part, as we all vowed before God on the altar.

I pray that God will give you the grace to flee from emotional affairs outside marriages, to avoid finding yourself in an uncontrollable adulterous act.

Written and Published by: 

BRO. ALIGWEKWE NNAMDI 

 

To the glory of God and for the salvation of men.

Call 08063413980 to share your reactions with the writer of this publication or email alignnamdi@gmail.com.